How do I choose a counsellor?
You’ve made the brave decision to seek some counselling. It’s important you find someone who you can be open with and that can feel like a really big decision.
A quick internet search can turn up lots of results and the choices out there can seem overwhelming - so where do you start? Here are some quick tips on narrowing down your options:
Location
Think about where you would like to see a counsellor. Would it be better for you to be near home or would you like to access counselling around your work? Lots of counselling directories allow you to search by town or postcode which will show you counsellors available near you.
Consider how accessible locations are. Would you need to use public transport or do you drive? Think about your journey, particularly if travel is something which might make you stressed or uncomfortable.
If you would prefer to stay at home then that’s no problem, look for a counsellor who offers online or telephone sessions.
Take your time
Starting with location will have reduced down the number of counsellors.
Now, make yourself a brew and take some time to look at the different profiles available. Visit their websites, read their information. This will give you details about how they work, their qualifications and professional memberships and hopefully a glimpse into their personality.
Some people find that they want to choose a therapist with similar life experiences, others might be looking for counsellors who specialise in certain areas. Ask yourself if you would prefer a counsellor of the same gender or someone who is LGBTQ+ positive? What will make the environment comfortable for you? Opening up is never easy, so you want a therapist who will accept you and make you feel safe and supported.
Cost
Private counselling comes with a cost but you can often access counselling quickly. Charities like MIND offer some limited free counselling but they can come with long waiting lists.
When looking at cost, look at how much does the counsellor charge per session and do they offer any reduced rates for people on low incomes, students or trainee counsellors?
Remember, you don’t always have to go once a week. Ask your counsellor, can you come fortnightly or monthly to spread out costs?
Ask questions
Lots of counsellors offer a free call or meeting enabling you to ask questions and find out more about therapy or counselling. Make use of this time and discuss your needs, if there is something specific you are hoping to get from counselling and any questions you might have - there are never any silly questions, so ask them all.
You might want to speak to more than one counsellor so you can compare them.
Meet them
Whether you are going for the first time or are a seasoned regular, the first counselling session can be nerve wracking. Once these feelings have settled, think to yourself - am I comfortable with this person, can I be open or work towards opening up, am I comfortable in this space.
Your relationship with your therapist is important. You need to feel comfortable sharing time and space with them each week.
Trust your gut
When you met the counsellor or spoke to them, what was the feeling you were left with? Reflect on how your first counselling session went and ask yourself the same questions again.
If the answer to any of them is no, then communicate that to the counsellor - they won’t be offended - they want to make sure you get the best counsellor to help you.
Pick the person who you feel you are more comfortable with not the person you think you should choose. It’s all about that relationship.
For more help and to find a counsellor you can visit MIND, British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP) or Counselling Directory.
If you have questions about counselling contact me.
